Heart Murmur & The Lunch Lady

I still haven't really made sense of it all yet. It happened after school the other day when Ty, me, Isaac, and Lucas were all in the kitchen getting a snack. And it all started with Ty saying something roughly like, "The lunch lady told me Isaac has a heart murmur."

Keep in mind, Tyler is an 11th grader in high school. He eats lunch at the High School. Isaac is in 7th grade at the middle school. He eats lunch at the middle school. So, it was puzzling for Ty to come home from an entirely different school and declare that Isaac has a heart murmur according to his lunch lady -- the "Sandwich Lady" to be specific. It was especially confusing 'since I have heard nothing of the so-called heart condition.

Apparently the Sandwich Lady is Kevin's Mom. Kevin and Isaac have known each other since pre-school. They are now studying the human heart in 7th Grade Health Class. This would not be a problem except that the lecture turned to heart diseases. That would not be a problem, except that Isaac is a hypochondriac.

Back in the fall, I went down to the Springs with Isaac to the Army Surplus Store. We were going to check out a military gas masks. He liked the look of them, and thought it would be very cool to get one, and wear it for Halloween. Most of the stuff at Army Surplus is used. So, the Russian gas mask that he got actually had some left-over sand in the eye sockets. It was safe to assume this gas mask had covered someone's face, in some sandy place, at some point. On the way back up Ute Pass, he was reading over the instructions, and testing out the strap. He put on the gas mask. Then, in a moment of wide-eyed fear, he whipped it off. "Could I have just caught something?" That conversation lasted the full 30 minute commute back up the mountain. It included every possible disease that may have been in the gas mask, and whether or not any of them were fatal. He got over it. We worked it out. And because he is who he is, the conversation was truly more funny than serious. But, point is, he's become hypochondriac. And it's new to him, this year. I think it's just a phase. But, I have no real explanation for it.
So, when in the course of Health Class, Isaac noted that he had some symptoms that lined up with a heart murmur, naturally he became concerned. So Kevin went with him to ask the teacher. Kevin overheard the whole Q & A between Isaac and the teacher. Apparently, Kevin became a bit concerned for Isaac and mentioned it to his Mom, who, also became concerned. So, Kevin is the key link to the Sandwich Lady who had talked to Ty at the High School. Viola! Mystery solved.
I came to find out later that Steve had already had a heart murmur conversation with Isaac. He tried to explain that it is not a contagious condition. In his most sensible way, he said, "Isaac, it's not something you can catch, it's a genetic deficiency."
To which Isaac replied, "But I'm tired. I have fatigue, and heart palpitations periodically ... those are definitely symptoms." They went around on the subject and landed in a saner place at the end.

By the time we were all talking about it over snacks in the kitchen, Isaac had already worked it out. He rolled his eyes and explained the whole thing. He's so totally over the heart murmur thing. Alrighty then. Good news.


Laura Parker said...

too funny. didn't know that about isaac. funny how news travels sooo fast in this small town!

Shannon O said...

That was cute, but I want it known it wasn't the cashier lady, that's for sure!!!

Kleigh said...

For the record ... it was NOT the Cashier Lady!!